A Rush of E Numbers to the Head

That would have made a better album title I think!

Sunday saw me reach the grand old age of 26 and after a pretty much disastrous Saturday I was welcoming a rest. Well, it could have been worse I spose; worse than a lunch where someone ended up paying 3 times more than they should have, then an evening spent having the house vandalised by some ignoramus and finally a bit of a health scare. Well, I say a bit; a heart rate of 160, breathlessness and chest pains isn’t just a bit. But in all fairness I’ve had it before so I just lay flat and think of England……..so to speak! Get your mind out of the gutter young man!

So to commiserate I brought in cakes today. Least I brought in a selection of chocolate rolls, doughnuts, apple pies and Heros. Fifteen minutes after sending round the obligatory email I’m not the proud owner of one pat on the head, one attempted birthday kiss and numerous emails from people pretending they cared it was my birthday. Ahhh office politics, don’t you just love them!

That brings me to my trip to Tesco this morning. I can never stomach the main superstore first thing in the morning so I head to the smaller Tesco which is just round the corner from work. The staff are much more pleasant and cheery and this morning was no different. I had already decided that with some of my birthday money I was going to treat myself to the DVD of Hot Fuzz. Heading over to the stand I was pleased to see that they had a few copies left. I noticed some mammoth Yorkie bars next to them, so thinking they probably cost a couple of quid and it was just a promotional thing I ignored the yearning I was experiencing, picked up my DVD, dumped it in the basket and headed to the till. Turns out that the mammoth Yorkie bars were free with the DVD I was purchasing so the check out assistant scuttled off to get me one. Feeling quite pleased I headed out to the car with my shopping and took a closer look at the Yorkie bar. This thing is seriously huge. I would estimate about 12 inches and each piece felt about the size of a small lama. Ok, maybe that’s a slight exaggeration but it has to be seen to be believed! As much as I feel sick at the thought, I can well imagine that the whole bar will disappear during the course of the film…….purely because of the gremlins that’ll come and steal it you understand!